When my mom’s out in public, she sends me pictures of lesbians she sees.
Jesus I envy that relationship.
this is like the time when my mum took me bra shopping and the girl measuring me up was a lesbian and my mum said to me “i’ll go take a walk around the shop so you can talk to this nice young girl” and gave me a look as if to say “chat her up”.
My mum tries to push me towards cute possibly gay girls and then disappears. She did it in Primark once and I found her hiding behind a pile of knickers, watching me.
i love all of your moms
When I was 17 I was convinced I was in love with the check out girl at the grocery store 5 minutes away from our house, so my dad went to get milk and somehow found an appropriate point in the conversation while buying a half gallon of milk to give her my number. Three days later she called me and asked if I wanted to come over “to watch a movie” and long story short my dad got me laid thanks dad.
One time my dad brought home a snake and put it in a tank and said I could have it for a pet and then the snake had like ten babies in the tank and I ended up releasing them all in the field near my house.
And your neighbors started to die left and right, and those who survived were the choosen ones to live by your side. If a snake apocalypse ever occurs, you know you have the protection of your “baby” snakes and you know you’ll be in a safe environtment because everyone around you is a survivor xD